Our week-long trip to chicago has delayed things severely, but today begins a three-day weekend (well-timed!), so here begins the catch-up...
Before I post the details of the trip, I'd like to document what we've learned the past week or so in the way of parenting tips (Parents: please don't hesitate to weigh in).
Saturday, we attended our friends' wedding at The Moody Church, and during the reception, got to pick the brains of a family of five that we know. One tip they shared with us was having everyone sit together at dinner until everyone has finished their meal. They've done this since their first child was old enough to sit at the table. The benefit they've reaped is well-behaved children in restaurants.
Before I post the details of the trip, I'd like to document what we've learned the past week or so in the way of parenting tips (Parents: please don't hesitate to weigh in).
Saturday, we attended our friends' wedding at The Moody Church, and during the reception, got to pick the brains of a family of five that we know. One tip they shared with us was having everyone sit together at dinner until everyone has finished their meal. They've done this since their first child was old enough to sit at the table. The benefit they've reaped is well-behaved children in restaurants.
I also observed an impressive mother of five frequently curbing her special-needs daughter's uninhibited gesturing during the reception. Every time her daughter vocalized or raised an arm, her mother would gently subdue the distraction, and always with a loving smile. It's interesting that constant behavior modification (or discipline, if you like) can amount to more smiles, at least more than many distracted parents give in conversation settings like this. Unique love reinforcement opportunities.
This same mother later reminded us to make an effort to continue in dating one another, in order to maintain the romance that acts as preventative marriage maintenance. The Pookies consequently discussed which habits we should and could implement in our week, and Pookie suggested that date night could actually be a date morning, since so often I'm tired at the end of the week at the end of the day and consequently less conversational during what's supposed to be a special time together. Saturday mornings after my coffee is a candidate on the horizon...
Sunday, the wifey pook read from one of my mother's parenting books, and gave us this tip: Spend 15 minutes a day with each child. During this time, the goal is to learn about your child's likes, and to avoid disciplining attitudes and measures as much as possible.
Monday, the parents of Saturday's bride impressed upon us the dangers of resorting to using the mommy-daddy bed as a sleep aid for your fussy pooklet. They reaped the consequences of that as one of their children grew as a toddler. However, they also gave us hope by relating to us that this same child learned to use the toilet at only one year of age. I think Pookie's mom gave us similar advice: Just sit the little booger down on the pot and get 'er used to her future potty home as soon and as often as possible.
I also read an article in the chicago tribune that reminded me of what a couple other books of ours taught, that babies should sleep after every 90 minutes awake. What I was more impressed by, though, was the writer's commentary on parenting philosophy on the first 6 months. In generations past, mothers stayed at home during the first half-year of the child's life, to ensure healthy sleep habits, something we are constantly preoccupied with. Nowadays, parents are all about retaining their social freedom at the expense of their baby's schedule. And it never fails, that the more we take the pooklet out and about, the more things with which we thwart his sleep regularity, the more likely he'll fuss that night.
Parenthood is sacrifice in service of your child. There's no getting around it. Yet I think our selfish nature tries to resist as much sacrifice as possible, till we're doing the bare minimum (according to society's current trends) as we can get away with.
I believe there's satisfaction in putting the child first (outside of facilitating co-dependence) just like there's satisfaction in putting your spouse first, in serving your family before self. The sooner you embrace that truth, the sooner you can concentrate on it and lose the tension that comes from fighting it, because, after all, the fighting, if you choose it, won't end. And there's joy in humility, especially in light of the future you can have with the greater rewards of a mature, loving family, instead of the lonely, logical end of a self-serving life.
It's just 6 months.
Monday, the parents of Saturday's bride impressed upon us the dangers of resorting to using the mommy-daddy bed as a sleep aid for your fussy pooklet. They reaped the consequences of that as one of their children grew as a toddler. However, they also gave us hope by relating to us that this same child learned to use the toilet at only one year of age. I think Pookie's mom gave us similar advice: Just sit the little booger down on the pot and get 'er used to her future potty home as soon and as often as possible.
I also read an article in the chicago tribune that reminded me of what a couple other books of ours taught, that babies should sleep after every 90 minutes awake. What I was more impressed by, though, was the writer's commentary on parenting philosophy on the first 6 months. In generations past, mothers stayed at home during the first half-year of the child's life, to ensure healthy sleep habits, something we are constantly preoccupied with. Nowadays, parents are all about retaining their social freedom at the expense of their baby's schedule. And it never fails, that the more we take the pooklet out and about, the more things with which we thwart his sleep regularity, the more likely he'll fuss that night.
Parenthood is sacrifice in service of your child. There's no getting around it. Yet I think our selfish nature tries to resist as much sacrifice as possible, till we're doing the bare minimum (according to society's current trends) as we can get away with.
I believe there's satisfaction in putting the child first (outside of facilitating co-dependence) just like there's satisfaction in putting your spouse first, in serving your family before self. The sooner you embrace that truth, the sooner you can concentrate on it and lose the tension that comes from fighting it, because, after all, the fighting, if you choose it, won't end. And there's joy in humility, especially in light of the future you can have with the greater rewards of a mature, loving family, instead of the lonely, logical end of a self-serving life.
It's just 6 months.
No comments:
Post a Comment